Shit List

Its twelve in the night and I am in the communal nest that is the office. Alpha male walked right past me as I was working. And did not wave, or smile or even for courtesy’s sake even ask me about my health. Yeah! I have made the shit list of the alpha male too.

Customer Questions

How do you kill a session in Apache?

Yes. You are outsourcing your core business operations to a group of brown mealy mouthed monkeys across seven seas. But “How do you kill a session in Apache?”. Shouldn’t you be more worried about the Taliban, Governance or something else.

Nut cases.

Customer Visits

Salesbaboon: We do DRP exercises every month

OrangeOrangutanCustomer: Really

Salesbaboon: Really. Some of these are not even exercises but real DRP tests

[Silverback goes Sigh!]

OrangeOrangutanCustomer: What do you mean.

[There are two possibilities now. The sales baboon can confess that we bomb our delivery centers every once every two weeks or we don't and someone else bombs our delivery center every two weeks]

Salesbaboon: See. Our process are so strong and our value additions are so good.

Sales. Redefine reality

WTF moment- Extra Special

From: silverhairedbaboon@sales.justatechcompany.com

To: technicalperson@gmail.com

Technical Person,

Congragulations!! I have just come to know from Silverback that you have quit our lovely organization and have decided to move onto another lovely organization. Which is wonderful. The “other lovely” organization is really brilliant and is quite differentiated. In fact the CEO of the “other lovely” organization quit our organization and joined their organization some six months back. So quite differentiated indeed. Though I think differentiated is not the word I need right now. Btw! I realize you have quit, changed your cellphone number, switched off your previous cell and moved to a different city all to avoid what you describe as this “total lack of concern for my personal life”, but I was wondering? Would it be possible for you to join a solution presentation call for a customer from 11.00 p.m. your time to 2.00 a.m. your time on Wednesday? Just asking. Do confirm.

Regards,

Silver Haired Baboon

A gentleman’s agreement

Hey Bollywood! If you are going to rip off a Hollywood movie, how about you try “A gentleman’s agreement”.  It’s got everything you want a moral dilemma, a love interest, a best friend whose honor needs protection, a mother angle, a vamp with a heart, office politics. Of course you can’t have the lovely Gregory Peck, but do try and rip off this movie please.